MovIng from Stuck to Started

Initiation is an Executive Functioning skill that helps us get started on a task, especially one that feels big, boring, or emotionally heavy. Think: homework, cleaning a room, starting a project, or even getting ready to leave the house. For many children (and adults!), initiation is one of the hardest skills to use consistently.

When our children struggle to begin a task, it can be misunderstood as a lack of motivation, defiance, or even laziness. But more often than not, what’s really happening is overwhelm:

• The task feels too big or endless

• They don’t know where to start

• The task feels boring, frustrating, or stressful

All of this can look like procrastination, and procrastination may be a signal that the brain needs more structure.

Initiation isn’t about willpower, it’s about having a clear, manageable plan. A good plan reduces overwhelm, gives the brain a clear starting point, and makes the first step feel doable. When our kids know exactly what to do first, getting started can become easier.

Here are a few ways to support initiation at home:

1. Break the task into small, manageable steps

   Big tasks can feel paralyzing. Smaller steps make them feel possible.

2. Make each step specific and actionable

   “Work on homework” is vague. “Open your folder and take our your math worksheet” gives the brain a precise place to begin.

3. Set clear expectations

   How long should this take? What does “done” look like? Clear expectations reduce anxiety and second-guessing, and help with task pacing. We can help scaffold balance and prioritization for our younger children, and as kids get older they can begin to take on more of this responsibility themselves.

4. Check in before starting

   Ask: “How does this plan feel?” If our child says it still feels overwhelming, that’s important information. We can go back and make the steps even smaller.
   
   
   Initiation is about creating plans that work. When tasks are broken down into realistic steps with clear starting points, and when we pay attention to how a plan feels, children learn how to move from stuck to started, one step at a time.
   
   With practice, these skills don’t just help with homework. They build confidence, independence, and resilience that carry into everyday life. All Executive Functioning skills can be taught, practiced, and strengthened with the right support in place.